Saying Yes to What Matters Most
Admittedly, I can often have too much on my plate.
I love to help others and love to say yes in order to help. It can get me in trouble and very often comes at the expense of me. The past few months, I've had to do some of my own inner work around why I'm saying yes, why I'm pulled into helping, and why it's hard for me to say no. I've recognized how painful and difficult this work has been and how necessary it's been for me. I've had to make some hard decisions to stop doing things I really enjoy and I've had to say no more. It's painful to even write it. 😅
I share this because I think the work we do as coaches can often lend itself to saying yes to others. We want to give of ourselves and our time in order to help.
I'd love to encourage you to peel back the layers on your yeses:
- Is it a yes because I truly love to do it?
- Is it a yes because I feel obligated?
- Is it a yes when I really want it to be a no?
- Is it a yes that aligns to my values, mission, vision?
- Is it a yes because I want to please someone and win their ongoing approval?
That last question is the one that really challenged me (thank you Steve Chandler) and forced me to take a long look at what I've been saying yes to the past few years. The longer I coach, the more I find myself having to do the work of coaching with myself.
Let's continue doing the work to show up for ourselves so we can show up well for us and our clients!
Erin Lego
2025 President - ICF Iowa Charter Chapter